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452 days ago

Police Remembrance Day – 29th September

Glen from Gonville

A police motorcycle officer stops a driver for shooting through a red light.

The driver, really aggro, steps out of his car and comes striding toward the officer, demanding to know why he is being harassed by the Gestapo!
So the officer calmly tells him of the red light violation.

The motorist instantly goes on a tirade, questioning the officer's ancestry, sexual orientation, etc., in rather explicit offensive terms.
The tirade goes on without the officer saying a dickybird.

When the officer finishes writing out the ticket he puts an "AH" in the lower right corner of the narrative portion of the ticket and then hands it to the 'violator' for his signature.
The bloke signs the ticket angrily, and when presented with his copy points to the "AH" and demands to know what it stands for.
The officer says, "That's so when we go to court, I'll remember that you're an a*hole."

Two months later they're in court.
The 'violator' has a bad driving record and he has a heap of points and is in danger of losing his licence, so he hired a barrister to represent him.
On the stand the officer testifies to seeing the man run through the red light.

Under cross examination the barrister for the defence asks; "Officer is this a reasonable facsimile of the ticket that you issued to my client?"
The police officer replies: "Yes, sir, that is the defendant's copy, his signature and mine, same number at the top."

Barrister: "Officer, is there any particular marking or notation on this ticket you don't normally make?"
"Yes, sir, in the lower right corner of the narrative there is an "AH," underlined."

"What does the "AH" stand for, officer?"
"Aggressive and hostile, Sir."

"Aggressive and hostile?"
"Yes, Sir.”

"Officer, are you sure it doesn't stand for a*hole?"
“Well, sir, you know your client better than I do.”

(Now how often can one get a lawyer to convict his own client?)

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More messages from your neighbours
2 days ago

Worst Xmas ever?

The Team from Neighbourly.co.nz

There's a a lot of planning that goes into Christmas day and sometimes things just don't go to plan. But it can be a good thing - a family mishap or hilarious memory that you can laugh about in Christmases to come.

Whether you burnt the dinner or were stranded at an airport...

Share your Christmas mishaps below!

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14 days ago

⚠️ DOGS DIE IN HOT CARS. If you love them, don't leave them. ⚠️

The Team from SPCA New Zealand

It's a message we share time and time again, and this year, we're calling on you to help us spread that message further.
Did you know that calls to SPCA about dogs left inside hot cars made up a whopping 11% of all welfare calls last summer? This is a completely preventable issue, and one which is causing hundreds of dogs (often loved pets) to suffer.
Here are some quick facts to share with the dog owners in your life:

👉 The temperature inside a car can heat to over 50°C in less than 15 minutes.
👉 Parking in the shade and cracking windows does little to help on a warm day. Dogs rely on panting to keep cool, which they can't do in a hot car.
👉 This puts dogs at a high risk of heatstroke - a serious condition for dogs, with a mortality rate between 39%-50%.
👉 It is an offence under the Animal Welfare Act to leave a dog in a hot vehicle if they are showing signs of heat stress. You can be fined, and prosecuted.
SPCA has created downloadable resources to help you spread the message even further. Posters, a flyer, and a social media tile can be downloaded from our website here: www.spca.nz...
We encourage you to use these - and ask your local businesses to display the posters if they can. Flyers can be kept in your car and handed out as needed.
This is a community problem, and one we cannot solve alone. Help us to prevent more tragedies this summer by sharing this post.
On behalf of the animals - thank you ❤️

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6 days ago

Poll: Would you rather: Christmas in summer forever or winter forever?

The Team from Neighbourly.co.nz

Just a bit of a fun poll to get you thinking.

If you had to live out your Christmas days, would you prefer it was a summer Christmas or a winter Christmas?

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Would you rather: Christmas in summer forever or winter forever?
  • 61.7% Summer
    61.7% Complete
  • 36.7% Winter
    36.7% Complete
  • 1.6% Other - I'll share below
    1.6% Complete
1359 votes