WARNING from an Old Lady....
"An older lady gets pulled over for speeding"...
Older Woman: Is there a problem, officer?
Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding.
Older Woman: Oh, I see.
Officer: Can I see your license please?
Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.
Officer: Don't have one?
Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving.
Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.
Older Woman: I can't do that.
Officer: Why not?
Older Woman: I stole this car.
Officer: Stole it?
Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.
Officer: You what?
Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see
The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.
Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please!
The woman steps out of her vehicle.
Older woman: Is there e a problem sir?
Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.
Older Woman: Murdered the owner?
Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.
The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.
Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?
Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers.
The officer is quite stunned.
Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.
The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer.
The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.
Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.
Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too.
Don't Mess With Old Ladies
What's your favourite recipe for courgettes?
Kia ora neighbours. If you've got a family recipe for courgettes, we'd love to see it and maybe publish it in our magazine. Send your recipe to mailbox@nzgardener.co.nz, and if we use it in the mag, you will receive a free copy of our January 2025 issue.
It’s Riddle Time! Beat the Neighbourhood with Your Smarts!
Which of the following words don't belong in the group and why?
CORSET, COSTER, SECTOR, ESCORT, COURTS
Do you think you know the answer to our daily riddle? Don't spoil it for your neighbours! Simply 'Like' this post and we'll post the answer in the comments below at 2pm.
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Live Q&A: Garden maintenance with Crewcut
This Wednesday, we are having another Neighbourly Q&A session. This time with John Bracewell from Crewcut.
John Bracewell, former Black Caps coach turned Franchisee Development Manager and currently the face of Crewcut’s #Movember campaign, knows a thing or two about keeping the grass looking sharp—whether it’s on a cricket pitch or in your backyard!
As a seasoned Crewcut franchisee, John is excited to answer your lawn and gardening questions. After years of perfecting the greens on the field, he's ready to share tips on how to knock your garden out of the park. Let's just say he’s as passionate about lush lawns as he is about a good game of cricket!
John is happy to answer questions about lawn mowing, tree/hedge trimming, tidying your garden, ride on mowing, you name it! He'll be online on Wednesday, 27th of November to answer them all.
Share your question below now ⬇️
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