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2189 days ago

Vegan, vegetarian or voracious carnivore ?

Bruce from Napier South

CHUCK LORRE PRODUCTIONS, #536

I've thought long and hard about this vanity card. What I'm about to say is going to upset quite a few people. Some of them are my friends. Or perhaps, after reading this, my former friends. But I can't let that stop me from speaking my mind. It's time to say out loud what I know in my heart to be true. Vegetarians and vegans are mobility bigots. They believe that if a life form doesn't move, it's fair game to be killed and eaten. They hold a deepseated prejudice against plants, or, as plants prefer to be called, "We Who Stand Still." This hateful philosophy is predicated on the idea that movement equals consciousness, or, if you will, a certain level of sacredness. To put it simply, if it walks, flies, or swims, or comes from something that does, it should not be ingested. If it doesn't, yum-yum. Of course when you ask vegetarians and vegans, they say no, they're only opposed to eating flesh. But what could be more fleshy than a mushroom? Or avocado? Or eggplant? The ugly truth is they are cowards who murder and devour anything that can't run away. These people, who act so high and mighty, so spiritually elevated, have somehow constructed a style of cuisine that would justify them eating my Uncle Murray, a man known for sitting still for hours at a time, staring at a TV that is turned off. So the next time you order a salad consider this: Prince told us that doves cry. But what if kale does too?

More messages from your neighbours
3 days ago

Poll: How do you feel about dogs being allowed indoors in cafes?

The Team from Neighbourly.co.nz

For most of us, seeing a friendly doggo while out and about instantly brings a smile to our faces. But how do you feel about cafes welcoming pups inside?

Cast a vote and share your thoughts below.

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How do you feel about dogs being allowed indoors in cafes?
  • 27.7% I love it!
    27.7% Complete
  • 31.5% Only in designated areas
    31.5% Complete
  • 40.8% No, it should be outdoors only.
    40.8% Complete
2090 votes
1 day ago

Take a little moment out of your day to solve this mystery minute!

Riddler from The Neighbourly Riddler

I have no life, but I can die. What am I?

Do you think you know the answer to our daily riddle? Don't spoil it for your neighbours! Simply 'Like' this post and we'll post the answer in the comments below at 2pm.

Want to stop seeing riddles in your newsfeed?
Head here and hover on the Following button on the top right of the page (and it will show Unfollow) and then click it. If it is giving you the option to Follow, then you've successfully unfollowed the Riddles page.

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3 days ago

This one was sent in by your fellow neighbour, can you figure it out?

Riddler from The Neighbourly Riddler

What is first white then red and the plumper it gets the more the old lady likes it?

Do you think you know the answer to our daily riddle? Don't spoil it for your neighbours! Simply 'Like' this post and we'll post the answer in the comments below at 2pm.

Want to stop seeing riddles in your newsfeed?
Head here and hover on the Following button on the top right of the page (and it will show Unfollow) and then click it. If it is giving you the option to Follow, then you've successfully unfollowed the Riddles page.

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