Pukeko - modern-day velociraptors
King of the paddock and river bank, pukeko (Porphyrio melanotus) remind me that the blood of dinosaurs flows through their veins. They have strutted over the Earth’s surface as velociraptors before hominids were even a blip on the evolutionary radar. Even their yips and crowing are like the sound effects from Jurassic Park (they probably are the sounds effects from Jurassic Park). They are beautiful with their regal blue and black plumage, but their eyes have that glint of intelligent thuggery and hard casual menace, like if you fell asleep on the wrong part of the river bank a gang of them would pounce and eat your face off. This severity is tempered by their fluffy white bottoms. People get down on them because they eat the odd bird – typically fledglings or ducklings – but give them a break; they are mostly vegetarian and have come a long way since they were apex predators only 70 million years ago. On the plus side, they will happily have a go at a cat or stoat roaming into their territory, which probably saves more ducklings than they kill. Look at it like having an almost benign overlord that you have to make the occasional sacrifice to for the good of the village.
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I have no life, but I can die. What am I?
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Happy Tuesday, neighbours, can you figure out today's riddle rush 🏃♂️
A bus driver goes the wrong way down a one-way street. He passes the cops, but they don’t stop him. Why?
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