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2130 days ago

Intimate Conversations

Ann from Relationship Wellbeing Specialist

Not really. Not entirely. Fear was taken from the reality of Merriam-Webster. Intimacy was taken from the reality of human relationships. Ultimately, when we are afraid of the possible consequences, we cannot trust our partners to listen and fully support us – especially not when it comes to our deepest feelings, hopes, or dreams. And why should we?

Our internal wiring prevents us from opening our hearts to those we fear will hurt us emotionally, from worries that they will let us down, to terror and anxiety about their potential to leave us. This is, in the language of evolutionary psychology, called an adaptive trait. It’s healthy. We need to protect ourselves!

Dr. Gottman understands this. His book on trust tells us to listen to these feelings, but also provides incredibly important methods for discerning how trust functions (or malfunctions) in our relationships. He doesn’t waste any time in getting to the core of the issue: trust begins in emotional attunement. Emotional attunement is often rooted in the ways in which we speak to each other – trust is built and broken in our everyday conversation.

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More messages from your neighbours
1 day ago

Poll: Do you think banning gang patches is reasonable?

The Team from Neighbourly.co.nz

With the government cracking down on gangs, it is now illegal for gang members to display their insignia in public places whether through clothing or their property.

This means arrests can be made if these patches are worn in places like restaurants, shops, on public transport or ferries, and on airplanes. Arrests were made recently at a funeral.

Do you think this ban is reasonable?

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Do you think banning gang patches is reasonable?
  • 76.6% Yes
    76.6% Complete
  • 22.1% No
    22.1% Complete
  • 1.4% Other - I'll share below
    1.4% Complete
1374 votes
17 days ago

What's your favourite recipe for courgettes?

Mei Leng Wong Reporter from NZ Gardener & Get Growing

Kia ora neighbours. If you've got a family recipe for courgettes, we'd love to see it and maybe publish it in our magazine. Send your recipe to mailbox@nzgardener.co.nz, and if we use it in the mag, you will receive a free copy of our January 2025 issue.

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2 days ago

Age Concern Christmas Social Hubs for the Hutt Valley

Steph Deegan from Age Concern Wellington Region

Meri Kirihimete - Merry Christmas

Come and join our fun Christmas Hubs:

Upper Hutt - Te Kupenga o Rongomai - Maidstone Sports Centre, Wednesday 11th Dec at 12pm featuring the Hutt Ukulele Orchestra.

Lower Hutt - Walter Nash Centre, Thursday 12 December 1:30pm