Auckland trains suspended
Auckland's train network is down and no trains are currently operating. Warnings are in place due to possible toxic smoke after a recent fire.
What you need to know:
- A large fire which broke out in the Auckland suburb of Favona overnight has been contained.
- Fire is causing a large plume of toxic smoke and South Auckland residents were advised to close all windows and doors and wear a mask as a precaution. The wind has now changed and Greenlane, Ellerslie, Mt Wellington and Penrose are also affected.
- King's College in Ōtāhuhu is closed today due to the smoke.
- Auckland’s train network is completely down with KiwiRail asked to evacuate its control centre.
You can keep up to date with the status of the trains on the Auckland Transport website.
New Year, New Questions You Won’t Solve!
I get smaller every time I take a bath.
What am I?
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What it feels like speaking with a MAGA American:
Me: “Your total is $44.19. Cash or card?”
The customer hands me a credit card but the chip inside it has been hole-punched out.
Me: “Uh, I don’t think this will work.”
Customer: “Why not? It hasn’t expired and I have money in my account.”
Me: “Sir… the chip is gone.”
Customer: “I didn’t want the chip.”
Me: “The card won’t work without it.”
Customer: “It just means I can’t enter my PIN, but you can still swipe it.”
Me: “I don’t think it will work, sir.”
Customer: “Just swipe it.”
I swipe it to prove a point.
Me: “It’s not working, sir.”
Customer: “Then you’re doing it wrong. Swipe it again!”
I do so again with the same result.
Customer: “Maybe you should swipe it so that the magnetic strip isn’t the thing being swiped?”
Me: *Swiping it as suggested.* “Sure, why not? About as much chance of it going through without the magnetic strip as there is without the chip – oh look, it didn’t work.”
Customer: “Your machine must be broken!”