Looking for spring planting tips?
In this week’s issue we invite you to Hawke's Bay’s Wildflower Sculpture Festival. It’s also time to harvest broad beans, sow carrots, protect your strawberries from birds, water seedlings gently, and get lawns ready for summer.
Check out our courgette variety guide and growing tips plus go in the draw for spring vege packs from Tui and ‘Blue Star’ ferns from Gellert’s.
Delivered every Friday to your email inbox, Get Growing digital magazine offers seasonal gardening advice from the NZ Gardener magazine's team of experts. Each week we answer all your burning questions on raising fruit and veges and tell you the top tasks to do in your backyard this weekend. Subscribe here:
New Year, New Questions You Won’t Solve!
I get smaller every time I take a bath.
What am I?
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What it feels like speaking with a MAGA American:
Me: “Your total is $44.19. Cash or card?”
The customer hands me a credit card but the chip inside it has been hole-punched out.
Me: “Uh, I don’t think this will work.”
Customer: “Why not? It hasn’t expired and I have money in my account.”
Me: “Sir… the chip is gone.”
Customer: “I didn’t want the chip.”
Me: “The card won’t work without it.”
Customer: “It just means I can’t enter my PIN, but you can still swipe it.”
Me: “I don’t think it will work, sir.”
Customer: “Just swipe it.”
I swipe it to prove a point.
Me: “It’s not working, sir.”
Customer: “Then you’re doing it wrong. Swipe it again!”
I do so again with the same result.
Customer: “Maybe you should swipe it so that the magnetic strip isn’t the thing being swiped?”
Me: *Swiping it as suggested.* “Sure, why not? About as much chance of it going through without the magnetic strip as there is without the chip – oh look, it didn’t work.”
Customer: “Your machine must be broken!”