ATTENTION ALL.
I’m feeling fairly upset and violated as my family and I have only been in our new rental home for less than a month. I went in our downstairs bedroom (spare room) this morning to open the windows and heard something fall only to realise someone has tried to break into our home. Obviously they’re not a great burglar but still. We’re located on Brashier Circle so if you see anything suspicious please report it. They used these with no luck of getting in. I’ve made a report to the police and have installed extra locks on all our windows. So good luck to the prick that did this I hope your hands fall off asshole!
New Year, New Questions You Won’t Solve!
I get smaller every time I take a bath.
What am I?
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What it feels like speaking with a MAGA American:
Me: “Your total is $44.19. Cash or card?”
The customer hands me a credit card but the chip inside it has been hole-punched out.
Me: “Uh, I don’t think this will work.”
Customer: “Why not? It hasn’t expired and I have money in my account.”
Me: “Sir… the chip is gone.”
Customer: “I didn’t want the chip.”
Me: “The card won’t work without it.”
Customer: “It just means I can’t enter my PIN, but you can still swipe it.”
Me: “I don’t think it will work, sir.”
Customer: “Just swipe it.”
I swipe it to prove a point.
Me: “It’s not working, sir.”
Customer: “Then you’re doing it wrong. Swipe it again!”
I do so again with the same result.
Customer: “Maybe you should swipe it so that the magnetic strip isn’t the thing being swiped?”
Me: *Swiping it as suggested.* “Sure, why not? About as much chance of it going through without the magnetic strip as there is without the chip – oh look, it didn’t work.”
Customer: “Your machine must be broken!”