Do you know a gardener using their greenthumbs to help their community?
Tell us about gardeners doing something worth celebrating in your community, and they could be in the running for the Ryman Healthcare Gardener of the Year! The winner will receive Vegepod product worth $1000. And the most colourful character receives $1000 worth of Resene paint.
Send up to five high-resolution photos and explain why you wish to nominate a person or group to be the Ryman Healthcare 2023 Gardener of the Year. Email your entry to mailbox@nzgardener.co.nz. Or post your nomination to 2023 Gardener of the Year, NZ Gardener, PO Box 6341, Victoria St West, Auckland 1142.
New Year, New Questions You Won’t Solve!
I get smaller every time I take a bath.
What am I?
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What it feels like speaking with a MAGA American:
Me: “Your total is $44.19. Cash or card?”
The customer hands me a credit card but the chip inside it has been hole-punched out.
Me: “Uh, I don’t think this will work.”
Customer: “Why not? It hasn’t expired and I have money in my account.”
Me: “Sir… the chip is gone.”
Customer: “I didn’t want the chip.”
Me: “The card won’t work without it.”
Customer: “It just means I can’t enter my PIN, but you can still swipe it.”
Me: “I don’t think it will work, sir.”
Customer: “Just swipe it.”
I swipe it to prove a point.
Me: “It’s not working, sir.”
Customer: “Then you’re doing it wrong. Swipe it again!”
I do so again with the same result.
Customer: “Maybe you should swipe it so that the magnetic strip isn’t the thing being swiped?”
Me: *Swiping it as suggested.* “Sure, why not? About as much chance of it going through without the magnetic strip as there is without the chip – oh look, it didn’t work.”
Customer: “Your machine must be broken!”