West Auckland Lawnmowing & Gardening Services
West Auckland Lawnmowing & Gardening Services provides property maintenance services in the Avondale, Glen Eden, Titirangi, Konini, New Lynn, Sunnyvale, Oratia, Glendene, Green Bay, and Kelston areas.
Lawnmowing, gardening, weed spraying, tree or hedge pruning, and other light property maintenance services are all charged out at one easy flat-rate fee of $60.00 per hour.
Clients may book a job via our "Text-To-Mow" service, which means a property only gets serviced when it actually needs a service.
"One-off" jobs and section clearing is a specialty.
Please download and complete the attached job sheet for any property service requests.
Please text (0204) 192-9415 for further information.
Job Sheet - West Auckland Lawns & Gardening Services.docx Download View
New Year, New Questions You Won’t Solve!
I get smaller every time I take a bath.
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What it feels like speaking with a MAGA American:
Me: “Your total is $44.19. Cash or card?”
The customer hands me a credit card but the chip inside it has been hole-punched out.
Me: “Uh, I don’t think this will work.”
Customer: “Why not? It hasn’t expired and I have money in my account.”
Me: “Sir… the chip is gone.”
Customer: “I didn’t want the chip.”
Me: “The card won’t work without it.”
Customer: “It just means I can’t enter my PIN, but you can still swipe it.”
Me: “I don’t think it will work, sir.”
Customer: “Just swipe it.”
I swipe it to prove a point.
Me: “It’s not working, sir.”
Customer: “Then you’re doing it wrong. Swipe it again!”
I do so again with the same result.
Customer: “Maybe you should swipe it so that the magnetic strip isn’t the thing being swiped?”
Me: *Swiping it as suggested.* “Sure, why not? About as much chance of it going through without the magnetic strip as there is without the chip – oh look, it didn’t work.”
Customer: “Your machine must be broken!”