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How well do you know your neighbours?
Some people refuse contact with neighbours even when they live in adjacent houses / apartments.
Do you know your neighbours? I don’t. I have been living in the same apartment for three years, but haven’t exchanged a word with my neighbours. Wonder why?
Let me explain. I’m kind of an antisocial. Don’t make friends easily, and don’t talk to strangers. An antiseptic smile is the best I can manage. Prefers to keep to myself and stick to the same circle of friends and relatives. Well, you can call me an introvert. That would explain my lack of interaction with neighbours.
My wife’s exactly the opposite. Yet, she has failed to strike up a conversation with the occupants of the flat across the corridor. The doors face each other. At times, we open the doors simultaneously, and the elderly lady behaves as if we don’t exist. So do the two young adults. We hardly get to see the other neighbours.
How young children make a difference
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Maybe they want to be left alone. I understand that. Yet, it feels strange. Weird, actually!
Humans, they say, are social animals. Our lives are interlinked and interdependent in some way, especially when we share a building. The blank stares and the radio silence in the elevators baffle me. Isn’t this a community? I ask myself.
I lived in another apartment for 20 years, and the experience was totally different. We had plenty of friends in the building and the neighbouring blocks. Some of those friendships exist even today, even after they have moved to other countries.
Much of the indifference may be due to big-city syndrome. People are so busy with their lives that they don’t have time for socialising.-
What’s the difference? One reason was our children. They were young and had plenty of friends. I remember a time when the doors of three neighbouring flats, including ours, were never locked as children kept moving from one house to another to continue their games. That was when my daughter was a toddler. At least 25 children in the neighbourhood would attend my son’s birthdays.
The children’s parents became our friends, and we called on each other for festive occasions and pujas. Sweets used to be sent and received during Diwali. Help used to be sought and given. Seems like another era.
Even after we moved, my wife maintained friendships in our old neighbourhood. She frequently travels there to attend birthdays, pujas, picnics, and other community activities. I often tease her, saying that her social skills haven’t worked in the new neighbourhood. She shrugs it off, saying it takes two people to strike a friendship.
Much of the indifference may be due to big-city syndrome. People are so busy with their lives that they don’t have time for socialising. When you get home from work late, visiting the neighbours is the last thing on tired minds.
What about weekends and holidays? Plans would have been made weeks ahead, and grocery shopping and prayers at a temple or a church are a weekend phenomenon. In homes where husbands and wives work, Saturdays and Sundays can turn into marathon cooking sessions to cover the week. All that doesn’t leave much time for neighbours and friends.
In many cases, it’s down to privacy. People value their privacy, which is why they keep to themselves. Imagine if your neighbours are nosy parkers. They could make lives miserable with incessant questions and the insatiable curiosity to know everything that happens in the neighbourhood.
None of us would want that. Right? Then why am I complaining?
You don’t have to take the biblical phrase “Love Thy Neighbour” literally. A little bit of social contact between neighbours wouldn’t hurt. And you don’t have to be friends with all the neighbours. A hello, a good morning, a smile, or a nod would suffice.
Do I do that? Yes, I do. Especially when I’m riding the elevator. It feels good when others return the gesture. A smile is the best. So keep smiling.
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Q&A: Ask a question about...Online Safety
Continuing with Neighbourly's online Q&A with experts in their field, this week we are tackling online safety with Jandy Fiske from Netsafe.
Jandy Fiske has been with Netsafe for nearly 8 years. Starting on their helpline, she's now Netsafe's Community Engagement Advisor. Jandy says: 'I'm passionate about online safety because I strongly oppose bullying and want to support those affected by it.'
Jandy is passionate about protecting vulnerable communities and is promoting online safety to ensure no one falls prey to online scams. She can answer your questions about any type of online scams, and also about online harm such as online bullying.
↓ Ask your question below now and she'll be online on Wednesday, 11th September to reply to you ↓
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Police are investigating after a bus driver was allegedly punched in the face and "had some teeth knocked" out in Avondale.
Police said it was alerted to the incident at about 10.17am yesterday.
"The driver received facial injuries and was transported to hospital," a spokesperson said.
"Police are making inquiries into the assault to identify those involved."
Tramways Union president Gary Froggatt said the driver was allegedly punched in the face by a passenger.
Froggatt wanted more to be done about "issues like this".
"I realise you can't have a policeman on every bus, but the drivers and the unions seem to be left out of the conversation.
"He's in hospital getting stitches put in his knee. He had his teeth knocked out," he said.
Froggatt said he got "about three or four calls like this" from drivers a month.
"I feel for the family, the drivers should be able to go to work and go home safe."
Auckland Transport said it was aware of the incident and assisting police with their investigation.
Group manager of public transport operations Rachel Cara said the bus operator was ensuring the driver has the support they need.
"We operate over 13,000 bus services every weekday and fortunately the majority of our passengers are amazing, but these isolated incidents are concerning.
"Our bus drivers work tirelessly to keep Aucklanders moving and deserve to feel safe in their place of work.
"We continue to work closely with police, other agencies and communities to improve safety on public transport."
Police urged witnesses to call 105.
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www.1news.co.nz...
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Poll: When shopping at Beds4U website, do you prefer in-store pickup or home delivery?
Delivery Preferences:
When shopping at Beds4U website, do you prefer in-store pickup or home delivery?
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13.3% In-store pickup, I like to see the product first!
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66.7% Home delivery, for convenience.
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20% Depends on the situation :)